The Broken Divorce System is Hurting Children and Families For The Profit of Lawyers

Letter to the Editor

I read with interest the July 13th New York Times Editorial, "The Politics of Exploding Houses."  I can't speak to weather NY State needs No Fault or not, what I can speak to is that the system of divorce in this country whether a fault or not fault state is very flawed and for the most part very biased against men, and in some cases against women too.  It is very much in favor of the divorce lawyers which you rightly state have inflated fees at the expense of millions of broken families within our great nation.

The whole system needs radical change.  However, change is very slow in coming very often since most legislative bodies are controlled by lawyers, some of them who continue to practice family law while working as our legislators.  This is a direct conflict of interest.
Most people do not realize that separating and divorcing men and fathers have one of the highest rates of suicide in our nation.  Very often these men are thrown from their house, robbed or alienated from their kids and destroyed financially and than are sometimes labeled as deadbeats.  The true label very often is dead broke dads.  Child support must be based upon reality and should be fair to all parties.
The system needs to be changed in many ways, especially for the health and welfare of our nations children.  Children of divorce have higher rates of suicide, drug use, alcohol use, early sexual activity and a host of other health problems.  When one parent is absent or is seen less, the children, according to research, develop father or mother hunger, and have even higher rates of the aforementioned problems.
So what is the solution.  First and foremost, our society must do more to try to help people maintain marriages.  Married people tend to live longer and have happier and healthier lives.  Most marriages run into some problems during the course of a marriage for a myriad of reasons.  Some people need assistance to work through those problems and society should find ways to encourage healing, especially where children are involved.  Where separation and divorce are inevitable, first and foremost, all states should adopt a presumption of Shared Parenting as was recently adopted in the great state of Iowa, when both parents are fit.  Second, people should be either mandated or encouraged to try mediation or collaborative divorce.  Divorce lawyers often tend to inflame an already emotional state just for their economic benefit.  This must change.
We have to find ways to make separation and divorce more civil, and do it for our nations children.  It is in their best interest and also in the best interest of the divorcing mom and dad.
Peter G. Hill
39A Warren Avenue
Weston, MA 02493
cell 617-763-3370