The American Coalition for Fathers
and Children
The American Coalition for Fathers
and Children is dedicated to
creating a family law system which
promotes equal rights for all
parties affected by divorce. Contact
the ACFC at 1-800-978-3237 or visit
them on the web at
www.acfc.org.
Parenting Plan Calendar Software
Shared Ground (R) is an
easy-to-use custody calendar
software program designed for
divorced families to track
visitation schedules. Includes a
built-in percentage calculator,
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Parents, attorneys, arbitrators and
mediators can generate equitable
parenting plans, which is especially
useful for parents seeking fair
division of their children's time.
FREE TRIAL SOFTWARE AVAILABLE by
clicking
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The Second Wives Club
The Second Wives Club is what women
in blended families are looking for:
Remarriage, divorce, child custody,
and step-parenting discussed in a
solution-oriented, mature, and
intelligent way; articles and news
written by thought-provoking experts
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and advice from some of life's most
interesting women.
www.SecondWivesClub.com |
Will I See You at the National Family Law
Reform Conference?
ACFC Announces Family Law Conference
Registration Fee Reduction, Travel Deals
An announcement from the American
Coalition for Fathers and Children regarding
their National Family Law Reform Conference
to be held September 15-16:
"We have heard from many people regarding
their desire to attend the National Family
Law Reform Conference September 15 -16th at
the Crystal Gateway Marriott in Arlington,
VA.
"We have also listened to the concerns
about the costs associated with attending
the conference. We want you to be here.
ACFC is pleased to let you know a
patron has offered to pick up 1/2 of the
full conference registration fees for the
next 100 registrants. Full access
to the conference (meals and program) is now
available for $112.50
Click here to register.
"If you are an ACFC member and would like
to attend the general session of the
conference on Friday and Saturday, without
meals and/or meal related programming, you
can do so for $25.00 Non ACFC members may
elect this option for $75.00 (So....become
a member for $25, then register for the
$25.00 conference option and save yourself
$25.00 in the process)
Click here to elect either of these options.
To join ACFC and become a member before
registering for the conference,
click here.
"When you make your hotel reservation,
let the hotel know you are attending the
National Family Law Reform Conference. The
reservation number for the hotel is: Please
contact the hotel directly at 703 920-3230
or toll free at 800 228-9290 to reserve your
room.
"Also, Southwest Airlines has just
announced a nationwide airfare sale for
tickets purchased prior to August 28th.
Southwest flies into Baltimore Washington
International Airport, which is about an
hour from the hotel.
Click here to check out Southwest fares
to/from BWI. One way ticket prices range
from $44 - $119.
"Reagan National Airport is 5 minutes
from the Marriott. The hotel offers free
shuttle service to and from the airport.
Dulles Airport is located about 45 minutes
from the hotel in Virginia. You should be
able to find good airfare pricing into
Washington for the conference. Book soon in
order to receive 14 day advance reservation
rates.
"A great program is being put together
and includes: Phyllis Schlafly, Warren
Farrell, Glenn Sacks, Michael McManus,
Stephen Baskerville and many others.
"Make plans to attend. You'll have a
great time, make good contacts and take away
valuable ideas, materials and action plans
for becoming a dynamic and effective family
law change agent.
"We'll see you there. There's good news
on a number of fronts regarding shared
parenting. We'll have another update soon on
activity around the nation."
Answer to Reader
Queries About a Couple Other Possible
Campaigns
Many of you have written to
me urging me to launch a campaign based on a
couple of current events. Below are my views
of them.
One of the proposed
campaigns is in opposition to AB 2781, a
California Child Support bill. California
fathers' rights activist William L. Spence
has distributed emails on this. Spence
writes:
"AB 2781 (Leno) Child
Support Collectors has passed the
Legislature and will reach Governor
Schwarzenegger's desk by the end of the
week. It provides that, beginning in 2010,
all child support orders include language
establishing a judgment in favor of any
private collector the obligee may choose to
contract with, by which the obligation may
be increased to cover the collector's fee,
by up to 33.3...% of any arrearage and up to
50% of the total fee (which thus may be as
high as 66.6%). To the best of my knowledge
this is the first time a law has enabled a
private contract to directly obligate a
non-party. It seems to me especially
dangerous that this extraordinary power is
being granted in the context of
circumstances that tend to arise as a result
of serious financial hardship, and in which
mischief---the vindictiveness of ex-intimate
partners---is unfortunately all too common.
It is, moreover, alternatively possible for
warranted collection fees to be recovered
through a tort action, or perhaps a new
cause modeled on that by which
litigation-related attorney fees are
customarily handled."
Spence is calling for the
Governor to veto AB 2781.
I'm not sure what Spence
means about "may be as high as 66%."
However, Spence makes several good points.
Like Spence, I hate to see any more debt or
burden placed upon California child support
obligors, because they are already very
overburdened. In my co-authored column
Some Progress for California Fathers, but
Still a Long Way to Go (Pasadena
Star-News & Affiliated Papers, Daily
Breeze [Los Angeles], 6/18/06) I wrote:
"In 1992 the California
legislature dramatically increased the
financial burdens shouldered by fathers.
Many child support orders doubled and
tripled overnight, quickly placing
California among the five states with the
highest child support guidelines.
"The legacy of this legislation is a
permanent underclass of fathers buried alive
under crushing debts. According to an Urban
Institute study of California child support,
the average arrears owed is $3,000 higher
than the median annual earnings of employed
child support debtors. Those in the poorest
category have a child support debt amounting
to their full net income for seven and a
half years."
Spence is also correct in his concern that
the law "has enabled a private contract to
directly obligate a non-party." I
investigated AB 2781 as the subject for a
possible column back in April, and this was
one of the first issues I raised with one of
Leno's staffers. She was stumped by it, too.
Apparently the California legislature has
found some way around this, and Spence is
correct to be concerned about its
implications.
On the other hand, there are
many positive aspects of this bill which
also merit consideration. Noncustodial
fathers are treated horribly by private
collection companies--many conclude that
it's worse to deal with them than with the
state enforcement agencies, which is saying
a lot. AB 2781 represents the first time
California has reined in these private child
support collection agencies, addressed their
abusive tactics and brought them under
government oversight. Noncustodial fathers
will benefit from these protections.
In addition, custodial
mothers are often the victims of predatory
private child support collection agencies,
and this bill will help them, also. While
custodial mothers are not my primary
constituency, I certainly support anything
that makes life easier for them as long as
it doesn't harm children of divorce and/or
their fathers.
In addition, some of AB
2781's provisions about obligating
noncustodial fathers aren't as unfair as
they may seem. When a noncustodial father
doesn't pay his child support obligation,
under current law the custodial mother must
pay the full cost of the private agency's
collection actions. It's not unreasonable to
spread that burden out between both the
custodial and noncustodial parents.
My conclusion? I have mixed
emotions about AB 2781. I won't be
heartbroken if Governor Schwarzenegger signs
it, but I won't be unhappy with a veto,
either.
The full bill can be seen at
AB 2781.
Finally What Child Support
Payers Need
Child Support obligors face
a stacked deck when squaring
off against CS Enforcement's
army of lawyers and agents,
all pitted against some
beleaguered father who's
working 50 hours a week to
pay his child support and
support his family. The
burden of proving compliance
with court-ordered support
falls on the obligor, not
the custodial parent or the
enforcement agencies. Very
often fathers are forced to
pay money they don't really
owe, or are saddled with
fake arrearages and the
concomitant interest and
penalties.
Since the state provides
a ton of free assistance to
custodial parents, fathers
need quality, affordable
representation for these
battles.
Child Support Liberation's
Child Support Audits and
Record Management Program
helps obligors challenge
arrears by producing
professional, top-quality
self-audits which include
all the necessary records in
the proper form.
CSARMP then conducts
quarterly audits that will
alert obligors to
overcharges. In addition,
they will maintain ongoing
records of obligations,
payments and interest.
CSARMP costs only $13 a
month ($38 for the first
month only) and can be
cancelled with only 30 days
notice. To learn more or to
sign up, click
here and
here. If you have any
questions, write to Michael
Kennedy of
Child Support Liberation
by clicking
here. |
|
The New Ford
Divorced Dad Ad
The other campaign many
readers have urged me to launch is against a
new Ford commercial. We've done campaigns
against TV commercials before--in 2004 our
Campaign Against Anti-Father Verizon
Commercial was covered by over 300 media
outlets, including CNN, Fox News, ABC, NBC,
CBS and several hundred newspapers. The
commercial, which can be viewed
here, portrayed an idiot father bumbling
to try to help his daughter with her
homework as his wife barked at him to "go
wash the dog." A few weeks after our
campaign was launched Verizon informed
us that
the ad would no longer be aired. I explained
my reasons for doing the campaign in my
column
Why I Launched the Campaign Against
Verizon's Anti-Father Ad (Pasadena
Star-News & Affiliated Papers,
11/18/04).
The new Ford ad, which can
be seen
here, is described by Slate as
follows:
"A family drives through
some gorgeous hills and along a pretty
coastline, making picturesque stops at a
roadside farm stand and a beach. 'The Ford
Freestyle crossover,' says the voiceover.
'More than 500 miles on a tank of gas.' Then
the SUV pulls to a stop in front of a
housing complex, where the dad gets out with
his luggage. 'Thanks for inviting me this
weekend,' he says to the mom. He hugs his
kids, they say their goodbyes ('See you next
week'), and the SUV drives off...
"The ad begins with
ho-hum familiarity. The stock shots of the
smiling family; the artfully filmed vehicle;
the announcer's cheerful pitch about fuel
efficiency. We're waiting for the lease/buy
figures to pop up on screen when...BAM! With
no warning, we find ourselves in the grip of
a stern domestic drama. The music goes
quiet. Dad gazes wistfully at mom, thanking
her for this time with his kids. Mom looks
back with wet eyes, barely able to muster a
reply. The camera pulls out and we see Dad
standing alone, with his sad little duffel
bag, in front of what one reader termed the
'Recent Divorce Condo Complex.'"
One reader wrote "The bottom
line is that it makes the fact that Dad gets
the kids every other weekend OK and he
should be grateful for anything else that he
gets that is parceled out according to the
mother's wishes. It treats as normal the
fact that the father is a second class
parent."
Perhaps, but I can't help
but wonder how Ford could have made a
divorced dad commercial without angering
many in the fathers' rights movement.
If the ad had portrayed a
shared parenting arrangement instead of an
every other weekend dad, our side would
complain that Ford is papering over the
oppression of divorced dads by pretending
that shared parenting is standard.
If Ford had made a
commercial where it was the mother who was
left behind, our side would be angry because
it shows a victimized woman when, in this
context, it's usually men who are
victimized.
If the dad hadn't appeared
cheerful and "grateful," our side would say
that Ford is portraying divorced dads as
angry, bitter men.
Some are angered that dad
was dropped off in front of the sad 'Recent
Divorce Condo Complex,' but if he had been
dropped off at a big house then we'd accuse
Ford of perpetuating the rich divorced
dad/Porsche/trophy wife stereotype.
I can't see how Ford could
have approached this much better than they
did. And when television doesn't show
divorced dads or pretends they don't exist,
we complain that our culture makes divorced
dads invisible.
My conclusion? I'm not crazy about the
commercial, but I don't see it as something
that merits launching a protest.
Accurate Paternity Testing
There are many important
reasons why people choose to
have a paternity test done.
A child is entitled to the
sense of belonging and
identity that comes from
knowing his/her parents. An
alleged father also has the
right to know if a child is
biologically his. Paternity
fraud in the United States
is unfortunately a fairly
common occurrence, affecting
perhaps millions of men. Now
you can get the accurate,
fast and affordable answers
to your paternity questions.
Visit
www.accuratepaternity.com
or call 877-434-0292 to talk
to a DNA testing expert or
to order a confidential test
today.
Do You and Your Kids Go
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www.woodgas-stove.com.
Attention California Child
Support Obligors
Under the
Compromise of Back Child
Support Program, when
money is owed to the
government (not the mother),
the government may
compromise on back child
support for up to 90% off.
This law was passed in
recognition of the fact that
there have been many
inequitable child support
judgments that can no longer
be appealed. We operate
anywhere in California--to
learn more about this
program, contact family law
attorney Robert Ackermann at
(310) 442-8240 or at
ChildsupportLA@aol.com. |
|
Michigan Family Law Official Calls
Glenn a 'Moron'
Apparently dad-bashing child support
hardliner Dean Winnie of the 30th Circuit
Court Family Division in Ingham County in
Michigan is full of love for me. According
to a Dads of Michigan member, at a recent
lunch meeting he blasted me for being a
"moron reporter" who felt sorry for
"deadbeat dads." Read a short account of the
lunch meeting
here.
Winnie is a supporter of Michigan
Attorney General Michael Cox, who has taken
numerous punitive measures against
noncustodial fathers. I've criticized Cox on
many occasions. In early 2004 Cox launched a
billboard campaign which featured a large
pair of handcuffs, and boasted of jail time
for fathers struggling with child support
obligations. We did two
His Side with Glenn Sacks shows on
it--to listen, go to
Michigan Fathers Under Siege (3/7/04)
and
Showdown in Motown: Michigan Dads vs. Leader
of ACES (4/18/04).
That fall Cox announced an even more
misguided and asinine billboard campaign--a
contest wherein children would draw
billboard designs critical of noncustodial
fathers who have allegedly not paid child
support. Fox News quoted me on the subject
as follows:
"Custodial mothers are encouraged to
coach their children to make designs
critical of noncustodial parents behind on
child support. And it doesn't take much
imagination to figure out which noncustodial
father many mothers will be encouraging
their children to denounce."
I and others launched a
Campaign to Help Michigan Activists Defeat
Anti-Father Billboard Contest, and the
Michigan activists did an excellent job
protesting Cox's campaign. Cox pulled the
contest in response to the protests. To read
my radio call to action on the issue, click
here.
I did two
His Side with Glenn Sacks shows on
the issue--see
Michigan's Top Cop Tells Kids: Denounce Your
Daddy (10/3/04) and
Fathers Targeted by Cox Speak Out
(10/10/04).
|
The North Dakota Shared Parenting
Initiative
There were two more good articles about the North
Dakota Shared Parenting Initiative last week--Wendy
McElroy's
North Dakota Debates Shared Parenting Law (Fox
News, 8/29/06) and
Dave Usher's
Trust Parents, Not the System (Men's News
Daily, 8/22/06).
Both authors question the legality and propriety
of state and federal officials openly campaigning
against the Initiative. The campaigning is also
revealing as to how the government bureaucracies
gain from the sole custody norm. Usher writes that,
for these officials, "the only thing that matters is
maximizing federal income to the state, even if it
means senselessly destroying the lives of children
and, indeed, fatherhood itself...[HHS Executive
Director Carol Olson] cares only about maximizing
federal revenues, pretending that decreases in state
expenditures [and correspondingly federal
entitlements] somehow represent a 'loss' to the
state."
To learn more about the events in North Dakota,
see
ACFC's North Dakota Shared Parenting Battle Heats Up.
Has Your Career Been Impacted by Custody
Issues?
After empowering people's careers for over
20 years, I was duly initiated into family
law just like you--through a 30 month,
$520,000 custody suit. I learned that a
solid home-based business could be the best
option, allowing one to shake the financial
shackles while still experiencing a "no
limits" career. More than ever, our kids now
need a free and available parent. Be there
for them...and for yourself. Darrell W.
Gurney,
www.CEOinShorts.com
Concerned about Financial Issues in Your
Divorce?
If you're concerned about financial issues
in your divorce, contact
Jim DiGabriele of DiGabriele, McNulty &
Co by email
here or at 973-243-2600.
Letters From a Deadbeat Dad
Have you ever been framed as a "deadbeat
dad" while you were just trying to be a
father? Have you ever been forced to pay
child support while being denied your basic
rights? Have you ever had to explain
Parental Alienation Syndrome to your own
child? Have you ever heard about fighting
family law battles outside the law by
following principles of non-violence--and
winning? Read
Letters From a Deadbeat Dad by
Cosmo Monkhouse. |
AlterNet Controversy Over Leving/Sacks Piece
Our AlterNet debate over reproductive
rights last month drew so many reader comments that
AlterNet Associate Editor Laura Barcella
wrote a whole separate piece--Birth
Control and 'Men's Rights'--on the controversy.
Family law attorney Jeff Leving and I had squared
off against feminist columnist Kai Ma--our column
was
Respect a Man's Choice, Too, Ma's was
The Difference Between a Womb and a Wallet. Our
column was the 3rd most read on AlterNet that
week.
Barcella's article doesn't give much space or
chance to our side of the issue, and she dismisses
many of our side's viewpoints as "tired
anti-feminist ideas," etc. She also put men's rights
in quotation marks. However, I do try to be positive
when I can, so, to Barcella's credit, while she
misspelled my co-author Jeff Leving's name all three
times, she did manage to spell mine correctly two
out of three times...
Expose False Allegations with
Technology
Don't let the anti-male bias in
criminal law victimize you. If you
could be falsely accused by an angry
woman, be prepared! Use technology
to expose the real aggressor.
DontMakeHerMad.com
Save Money and Get Better Gas
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To learn more, click
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New Jersey Divorce and Family Law
New Jersey family law attorney David
Perry Davis, Esq. can help you
through your divorce. In Pasqua
v. Council (2006) Davis
successfully challenged New Jersey's
unconstitutional practice of failing
to appoint attorneys for indigent
child support obligors at
enforcement hearings where they face
incarceration. As a result of this
suit, trial courts must apply the
same standard used when a defendant
requests a public defender in a
criminal matter.
www.dpdlaw.com |
|
PBS Update
As I explained in the last enewsletter, the
documentary on family law which PBS promised after
our
Campaign Against PBS's Father-Bashing
Breaking the Silence
is called
Kids & Divorce: For Better or Worse, and it will
be airing on PBS affiliates in mid-September. To
learn more, see
PBS Documentary on Family Law to Be Aired
(8/22/06).
Below is a list of some of the stations and dates
where
Kids & Divorce: For Better or Worse is scheduled
to air. Just as
Breaking the Silence did not air on some PBS
stations,
Kids & Divorce won't either. However, if you
know of an airing of
Kids & Divorce which is not listed, please email
us at
glenn@glennsacks.com.
WGBH in Boston (9/12/06, 9/15/06, 9/17/06)
KQED in the Bay Area/San Francisco (9/15/06,
9/16/06, 9/17/06)
KTSC in Denver/Rocky Mountains (9/28/06)
KLRN in San Antonio, Texas (9/14/06, 9/17/06,
9/19/06)
KNME in Albuquerque, New Mexico (9/17/06)
WNET in New York City (10/25/06, 10/26/06)
GTE in Toledo, Ohio (9/14/06, 9/18/06)
New Hampshire Public Television (9/21/2006)
Alabama Public Television, (9/15/06, 9/19/06,
9/21/06)
KLRU in Austin, Texas (9/15/06, 9/16/06)
Louisiana Public Broadcasting (9/14/06, 9/15/06)
Wisconsin Public Television (9/14/06)
KUED in Salt Lake City (9/14/06, 9/16/06, 9/18/06)
WPSU in Central Pennsylvania (9/16/06, 9/18/06)
KTWU in Topeka, Kansas (9/15/06, 9/17/06)
MPTV in Milwaukee, Wisconsin (9/16/06, 9/17/06)
Iowa Public Television (9/14/06)
KTNW in Washington state (9/15/06, 9/17/06)
Kentucky Educational Television (9/14/06, 9/16/06,
9/17/06, 9/18/06)
KACV in Amarillo, Texas (9/14/06, 9/15/06, 9/18/06,
9/20/06)
NMU in Michigan (9/14/06, 9/18/06)
WTVP in central Illinois (9/17/06, 9/18/06)
KEDT in Corpus Christi, Texas (9/14/06)
WNED in Buffalo, New York (9/24/06)
PBS is also selling DVDs of
Kids & Divorce: For Better or Worse at Shop PBS
here.
Help for Maryland Fathers
Family law attorney
Dawn Elaine Bowie works
to protect parents'
relationships with their
children and reduce
post-divorce conflict. She
practices in Montgomery,
Anne Arundel and Prince
George's Counties. Contact
her at
attorneydawn@marylandfamilylawfirm.com
or go to
www.marylandfamilylawfirm.com.
Tree House Solutions
Tree House
Solutions, LLC is a growing
and evolving resource
designed to meet the
emotional and informational
needs of parents who are
going through divorce and
those already divorced. Tree
House activities are
composed of live, real time
teleconferences on a weekly
basis. These sessions are
conducted by two highly
experienced mental health
practitioners, versed in
high conflict divorce. Drs.
Bone and Evans offer a wide
spectrum of suggestions and
education regarding the
divorce process and
co-parenting with difficult
former spouses.
www.treehousesolutions.org
|
|
John Murtari Update
Last enewsletter I wrote about John Murtari, a
loving father to his 13 year-old son Domenic, who
refused food and water after his incarceration on
July 31 for a questionable child support arrearage.
Murtari subsequently received a feeding tube. I've
read John's e-newsletter for the past several years,
and while at times I've disagreed with his tactics,
I do respect his courage, courteous manner and
fighting spirit. To learn more about John's
situation, and for the latest updates, go to Teri
Stoddard's blog
here.
Also, see the Syracuse TV news broadcast
Syracuse inmate on hunger strike.
I Get Letters Like This All the Time
The
Associated Press story
Police: De Queen woman slaps self, tells cops that
husband did it sounds like something out of my
email box:
"DE QUEEN, Ark. Police at De Queen say a woman
slapped herself several times in an effort to fake
injuries from domestic abuse after she had stabbed
her husband. But the effort didn't prevent police
from arresting Dorris J- Holcombe on a charge of
second-degree domestic battery.
"The 41-year-old Holcombe pleaded not guilty to the
charge in Sevier (suh-VEER') County Circuit Court.
Her 38-year-old husband Gary said his wife beat
herself in the face after he called police to report
she had stabbed him on August Tenth.
"Deputy Cameron Petross said Gary Holcombe suffered
a minor cut in his chest. A police report filed in
the case said the couple's landlord saw Dorris
Holcombe slapping herself.
"Police said that, while in the back of the patrol
car following her arrest, Dorris Holcombe started
hitting her head on the restraining cage, causing a
small cut near her right eye."
If it weren't for the witness, and had the woman
behaved herself in the patrol car, the scam probably
would have worked...
In Defense of the National Organization for Women
Obviously I'm a frequent critic of the
National Organization for Women. A few examples
include:
NOW at 40: Group's Opposition to Shared Parenting
Contradicts Its Goal of Gender Equality (New
York Daily News, 7/27/06);
Alito and the Rights of Men (Los
Angeles Times, 11/1/05);
HB 5267 Will Help Michigan's Children of Divorce
(Lansing
State Journal, 5/28/06);
California NOW Takes Stand Against Working Mothers
(Sarasota
Herald-Tribune, 2/23/04);
New California Move-Away Law Hurts Children of
Divorce (Long
Beach Press Telegram, 10/18/03);
Fathers Bear the Brunt of Gender Bias in Family
Courts (Insight
magazine, 8/19/02);
and Why Are There so Many Women in the Fathers'
Movement? (Minneapolis
Star-Tribune, 6/21/02).
However, though NOW is often wrong, it doesn't mean
that they're always wrong, and it certainly doesn't
mean they're responsible for every damn thing which
is wrong in the world of gender relations. NOW is
often scapegoated, and is the target of incessant
stupid criticism from both men's activists and
conservatives. On
His Side with Glenn Sacks I once explained:
"Over the past three decades women and
feminists have locked men into endless double-binds,
where whatever men do, they're wrong. However, on a
much smaller scale, men's activists have begun to
lock women into double binds, too.
"For example, when groups such as the National
Organization for Women oppose the war in Iraq, we
accuse them of betraying the men who are abroad
putting their lives on the line for our country. Yet
when women support military action (like the war
hawk columnist/talk show host Tammy Bruce) we say
'yes, you want to send all the men off to die and
women don't even have to register for the draft!'
"When women want a larger role in the military, we
point to biological gender differences and say women
will screw up the military. When they don't, we talk
about how unfair it is that only men get drafted.
"When a mother pursues her career, some MRAs blame
her for putting her self-fulfillment above her kids.
Yet if she doesn't work, she's condemned for
burdening her husband and not pulling her weight.
"Many, such as radio talk show host Tom Leykis,
condemn women for grinding out children they and
their husbands can't afford. Yet they are the first
ones to call a woman who looks for a high-earning
man a 'gold-digger.' And the guy who blames
feminists for the loose sexual morality and mores of
modern society is the first guy to condemn the woman
who won't put out."
One example of this incessant stupid
criticism is political commentator
Carol Liebau's recent criticism of NOW on the
Independent Women's Forum blog. In the blog entry
"Misplaced Outrage" Liebau writes:
"The New York Times runs
a blood-chilling piece on the disregard for
human rights--and brutal mistreatment of women --
that's taking place in Chechnya.
"So what do the American feminists have
to say? Typically, NOW has chosen instead to focus
on the
really important things...like complaining that
Plan B's placement behind pharmacy counters may mean
that a woman seeking emergency contraception must
endure 'a moralizing lecture from the cashier or
pharmacy clerk.' Oh, the horror."
A few points:
1) As far as I can tell, NOW's position
that Emergency Contraception should be available
over-the-counter is correct. NOW President Kim
Gandy's statement on it is
here.
2) More importantly, what on earth does
one issue have to do with the other? NOW wasn't
immediately on top of the Chechnya story, so that
means they're wrong for taking a public position on
Emergency Contraception in the US? Because there's
something else horrible going on in the world,
efforts to change the things which we have the power
to change are invalidated? NOW is often criticized
by men's activists and conservatives this way, and
while it's sometimes fair, it usually strikes me as
a cheap shot.
It also reminds me of some of the logic
of critics of my
Campaign Against 'Boys are Stupid' Products. I
was slammed in newspapers and on TV and radio
because, after all, "Boys are Stupid" products
aren't the most important thing on the planet, and
there are other, more pressing problems in the
world. Gee, no kidding...
The best one was some guy who saw me on
TV and told me that I was wrong to use my radio show
to attack the "Boys are Stupid" T-shirts when
there's so much hunger in the world. I told him
"You're right--you've got me. I should've used my
radio show to end world hunger instead."
Help for Seattle Fathers
The Law Offices of O. Yale
Lewis III is a one-person
law firm that focuses on
customer care. Mr. Lewis can
help you identify and focus
on the outcome that you want
and implement the steps
necessary to get there.
www.yalelewislaw.com.
Help for California Divorced
Dads
The Divorced Fathers Network
helps dads in Los Angeles,
the Bay Area and Santa Cruz.
Local chapters sponsor free
weekly co-parenting classes,
individual mentoring for
fathers and much more.
www.divorcedfathers.com.
|
|
Column: New American Bar Association Article Points
to Crisis in False Paternity Judgments
My recent co-authored column,
New American Bar Association Article Points to
Crisis in False Paternity Judgments (Baltimore Sun, 8/20/06), discusses
the problem of fallacious default paternity
judgments and attorney Ron Henry's excellent new
Family Law Quarterly article
The Innocent Third Party: Victims of Paternity Fraud
(Summer, 2006). In the column Mike McCormick,
Executive Director of the
American Coalition for Fathers and Children, and
I wrote:
"Child support enforcement programs are
supported by all sides of the political spectrum,
from women's advocates on the left to
traditionalists on the right. While this popularity
is sometimes understandable, it has also allowed
glaring and inexcusable abuses to fester and grow.
Of these, none is more egregious than when men are
forced to pay 18 years of child support for children
who are not theirs, and who in many cases they've
never even met...
"Because of the indifference of both
the states' child support enforcement systems and
their federal funders, no firm figures exist on how
many men have been mistakenly defaulted into
fatherhood. Henry estimates that the number could
exceed one million.
"Child support debtors receive little
public sympathy, at times with reason. Yet the
victims of false paternity judgments aren't men
trying to evade their legitimate responsibilities,
nor are they Nicholas Barthas determined to ensure
that their exes will never get a penny. They are
instead victims of one of the most indefensible
civil rights violations in America today--an
injustice which cries out for redress."
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same advice about solving problems. But
when we ask men what works for them, we
hear a different story.
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The Default Paternity Judgment Innocence Project
We have formed the
Default Paternity Judgment Innocence Project for
the purpose of ending the cruel practice wherein
unsuspecting men are trapped by default judgments
into paying 18 years of child support for children
who are not theirs, and who in many cases they've
never even met.
This money rarely goes to children, but
instead to the state. The problem is a result of
bureaucratic bungling and misguided state and
federal child support enforcement policies which
benefit no one, and which could be corrected at a
relatively small cost.
The DPJIP has been endorsed by numerous
family law and mental health professionals,
African-American and Latino community leaders,
journalists and others. DPJIP members have written
about or been quoted on this issue in numerous
publications, including the
New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, Reason Magazine,
the
Orange County Register, the
Los Angeles Daily News, the
Detroit News, the
Washington Times and many others.
Dozens of Family Law, Mental Health Professionals
Endorse the Default Paternity Judgment Innocence
Project
The Default Paternity Judgment
Innocence Project has been
endorsed by nearly 50 family attorneys, mental
health professionals, journalists and others. Some
of our endorsers include:
Reginald Brass, president of
My Child Says Daddy, a parenting organization
which works with young African-American fathers in
Los Angeles.
Linda S. Ferrer, the Orange County,
California attorney who won the decisive
Navarro default judgment case.
David Perry Davis, the New Jersey
family law attorney who won the
Pasqua v. Council case, wherein Davis
successfully challenged New Jersey's
unconstitutional practice of failing to appoint
attorneys for indigent child support obligors at
enforcement hearings where they face incarceration.
Taron James, founder of Veterans Against
Paternity Fraud.
Marc Angelucci, the Los Angeles attorney who
represents
Taron James.
Psychiatrist Michael Friedman, M.D., a Board Member
of the Association of Family and Conciliation Courts
of California.
Jayne A. Major, Ph.D., Executive
Director of
Breakthrough Parenting Services in Los Angeles.
Diana Mercer, an Attorney-Mediator with
Peace Talks Mediation Services in Playa del Rey, CA.
Bert Riddick, the nation's poster boy for false
default judgment victims.
Michael Robinson, Legislative Advocate
& Policy Consultant for the
California Alliance for Families and Children in
Sacramento.
Peter M. Walzer, a family law attorney who was one
of the important figures in our 2004 and 2006
campaigns to preserve the California Supreme
Court's
LaMusga decision.
What's the Solution?
The
Default Paternity Judgment Innocence Project
proposes several solutions to this problem. State
child support collection efforts are heavily
subsidized by federal dollars. The federal
government could greatly reduce the problem of false
paternity establishments by reimbursing states only
for establishments which are confirmed by DNA tests.
DNA tests could be purchased in bulk at a cost per
unit considerably less than even one month of child
support.
States should also act to reduce default judgments
by improving service of process and by making the
procedure more understandable for litigants, few of
whom have legal representation. In default judgment
cases, DNA testing should be required as soon as the
child support enforcement agency locates the
putative father.
To be a part of our efforts, sign up
for the
DPJIP's e-newsletter on
this page.
Father Sues Adoption Agency for Giving
Away His Baby Boy
Mark Huddleston is the biological
father of a two year-old boy he says he wants to
raise. But a judge has ruled the child should remain
with its adoptive parents, who have had custody
since the infant was three days old. Huddleston
claims he didn't know the baby existed until two
months after its birth, and the state said the
private adoption agency hadn't properly notified
Huddleston.
Despite doing everything possible to be
a father to his son, Huddleston's baby boy was given
away by a vindictive mother working hand in glove
with a predatory adoption agency. Last summer we
covered the Mark Huddleston case on
His Side with Glenn Sacks--to listen, go to
Father Fights Adoption Agency for Right to Raise His
Son (7/17/05).
Jane Spies of the
National Family Justice Association, who has
done wonderful work on the Huddleston case, informs
me that Huddleston is now suing the adoption agency.
According to
Biological parent of toddler files lawsuit against
Albuquerque Agency (Albuquerque Tribune,
8/22/06):
"The biological father of a 2-year-old
boy has filed a lawsuit against the Albuquerque
agency he says put his son up for adoption without
his permission.
"The lawsuit, filed late Monday in
state District Court in Albuquerque, charges that
Adoptions Plus knew or should have known that Mark
Huddleston, 40, was the father of the child but
purposely failed to notify him of the existence of
his child and failed to obtain his consent to the
adoption...
"Huddleston's lawsuit comes nearly a
month after the state Court of Appeals reversed a
decision by state District Judge John Pope in
Valencia County to terminate Huddleston's parental
rights.
"According to that opinion, it was not
sufficiently proven that Huddleston had abandoned
the child after the birth and that his consent was
required before the mother proceeded with the
adoption.
"The appellate court also ruled that
Huddleston's actions, or lack of them, before the
baby's birth didn't prove that he caused the
parent-child relationship to disintegrate.
"According to the appellate opinion,
the child was the result of a six-month relationship
that ended June 2003 between Helen G., an
Albuquerque hotel employee, and Huddleston, an
account executive for a company that delivered
chemicals to the hotel.
"Huddleston's lawsuit said that the
mother kept her pregnancy a secret and that she
'insisted' that he have no further contact with her
once the couple split up.
"In January 2004, the lawsuit said that
Helen contacted the agency to put her unborn son up
for adoption and that she identified Huddleston and
another man as the possible fathers.
"The baby was born Feb. 14, 2004.
According to previous court documents, the infant
was placed three days later into the adoptive home
of Bobby and Rosario Romero...
"But Huddleston said he did not know he
had fathered a child until he received a notice from
the adoption agency three days after the notice date
of April 16, 2004, the lawsuits said.
"Huddleston, the lawsuit states,
immediately called the agency but was told to call
back in the morning. That day, he and his wife spoke
with Catherine Troy, Adoptions Plus executive
director and placement supervisor, in person and
were told by her that he had no right to the child,
the lawsuit said.
"'She said he would never get custody
of the child and that the child had been placed in a
good home,' the lawsuit said. 'Ms. Troy also
admitted that she never notified Mr. Huddleston
about the adoption and termination proceedings.'"
"That same day, Huddleston hired an
attorney. Later that month, he filed a paternity
suit to contest the adoption.
"A DNA test court-ordered in May 2004
was delayed by the Romeros and finally conducted in
June 2004; the test indicated that Huddleston was
the father, the lawsuit said.
"Despite that, the lawsuit said
Huddleston was denied visits with and photos of his
son until December 2004 when he was allowed limited,
supervised visits after the state Children, Youth
and Families Department intervened.
"Those visits were stopped with Pope's
decision to terminate his parental rights on April
14, 2005.
"The lawsuit says that as a result of
the actions of Adoptions Plus Huddleston has
suffered severe emotional pain, distress and
anxiety, loss of earnings and substantial financial
expenses.
"The lawsuit seeks financial
compensation of more than $40,000 in legal fees as
well as punitive damages."
Read the rest of the article
here. Let's hope Huddleston wacks the agency
good--perhaps that will provide these adoption
agencies with the incentive to stop giving fathers'
children away...
Are You Really the Father?
Find out the underlying flaws in the DNA
paternity testing system and learn how a
man with results in the 90%, 95% or even
99% positive range may not be the
father. Learn what most lawyers and
judges don't know about paternity
testing.
www.paternitytestflaw.com.
Congressional Candidate Takes Strong
Stand for Noncustodial Parents' Rights
In 2004 Libertarian presidential
candidate Michael Badnarik had a strong
noncustodial parents' rights
platform. Badnarik is clearly aware
of and sensitive to the basic problems
fathers today face, particularly the
sole custody norm and the denigration of
noncustodial parents to "second class
parent" status. Badnarik is running for
Congress in 2006--to learn more, go to
www.badnarik.org. |
Conservative Censorship?
One of my readers wrote me and told me
that when he tried to post my recent column
Respect a Man's Choice, Too (AlterNet, 8/1/06) on
www.freerepublic.com, a popular conservative
website where he frequently participates in forums,
freerepublic blocked him and sent him the following
message:
"Source is Blocked, article not posted
alternet.org material not wanted on FR."
Perhaps there's more to this than I'm
aware of--if anybody knows anything, feel free to
educate me. But at first glance it appears to be the
same type of suppression of voices that
conservatives often claim liberals are guilty of.
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Men 'Deserve What They Get'?
A few weeks ago
Metro Silicon Valley published a
large article on the problem of fallacious default
paternity judgments--Who's
Your Daddy? (Metro Silicon Valley, 7/19/06). As
I noted in my co-authored column
New American Bar Association Article Points to
Crisis in False Paternity Judgments (Baltimore Sun, 8/20/06), these men
"are forced to pay 18 years of child support for
children who are not theirs, and who in many cases
they've never even met...the victims of false
paternity judgments aren't men trying to evade their
legitimate responsibilities, nor are they Nicholas
Barthas determined to ensure that their exes will
never get a penny. They are instead victims of one
of the most indefensible civil rights violations in
America today--an injustice which cries out for
redress."
Metro Silicon Valley has a circulation of
200,000 and is one of the largest weekly
publications in California. The article has quotes
from numerous people involved in the struggle
against paternity fraud, including: longtime
paternity fraud crusader Carnell Smith;
Taron James, the founder of
Veterans Fighting Paternity Fraud; Santa Ana
family law attorney Linda Ferrer, winner of the
Navarro case; myself; and others. To learn
more see
CA Weekly Does Cover Story on Problem of Default
Paternity Judgments
Since then there have been
some interesting reactions to the piece. One is
feminist Theresa Vander Horn's
Men Deserve What They Get. Vander Horn writes:
"Leave it to
Metro to trumpet a men's cause that
isn't ("Who's
Your Daddy?," MetroNews, July 19). By any
measure, the overwhelming problem in child support
is lack of it. Yet
Metro finds a few hapless men who
couldn't be bothered even to show up in court on
their own behalf. This is not a child support
problem, not even a paternity problem. This is a
delinquency problem. Their problems would be the
same if they had failed to show up in traffic court
or small claims court. What the public does need to
know is that "men's rights" groups are often tied to
religious groups. The "right" that men's groups are
protecting is the "right" to have sex whenever they
please with whomever, the right to parent if and
when they feel like doing so and the right to "move
on" if and when it suits them. This is the assertion
of biblical domination of women. Any attempt to hold
them accountable is assailed as flawed and unfair.
(Heaven forbid life be unfair to a man.) If a man is
so indiscriminate that he doesn't even know if he
has fathered a child, that man is not so innocent
after all. These men are reckless, just as reckless
as the men who show up months or years later to
claim babies they didn't even know they had (i.e.,
Baby Jessica, Baby Richard ...). The "right" being
protected for these men is the right to be reckless
and carefree--a rare luxury for women on this globe.
Women have been dealing for centuries with the
fall-out of men's reckless sexual behavior and all
women ever got was advice to be more chaste. Yet
when a few not-so "innocent" men are caught in the
undertow, they squeal like drowning pigs and their
meager cries drown out the wails of women going down
shit's creek by the millions. Given the magnitude of
paternal delinquency, the gerrymandering of support
guidelines and the disparate impact of women, why
does
Metro trumpet the cause of these
few hapless delinquents?"
Another interesting letter
is
Men R Not Always Pigs from shared parenting
advocate Adryenn Ashley. Ashley writes:
"The default rate [in Los
Angeles] was so high because the County of Los
Angeles hired a process serving company that is
known in the industry for less than professional
service. So while a default may have been taken
against a man, that in no way means that he actually
got served. That really depends on who said he got
served. Process servers are like roofers, you have
some excellent ones and some shabby ones who will do
anything to earn the fee, even signing that they
served a man in an apartment complex that burned
down the month before. Or in Taron James' case,
served him at the corner two-story blue house, when
he lives in the middle of the block in a one-story
white house. And in court, I have seen that evidence
not make a bit of difference to the judge."
(A quick note to
Metro Silicon Valley's headline
writer--we men aren't
always pigs? Gee, thanks!)
Another interesting letter is
Amazing Expose from one of my readers, John
Lehman. Lehman writes:
"The most astounding thing in the whole
article is near the end, where Ms. Ruttenberg shows
that the government makes no attempt to hold mothers
accountable even when (as illustrated earlier in the
article) they wreak such havoc by naming the wrong
father. Many readers will also have noticed that
women generally are not held accountable for lying
about anything: rape, domestic violence, and so on
ad nauseum. A lot of us have been
their victims. (Women are sometimes victims in other
ways, but that's beyond the scope of this letter)."
Best Wishes,
Glenn Sacks
GlennSacks.com
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