to The Connecticut Legislators
I find your position on shared parenting
inappropriate and less than knowledgeable
on the subject. In fact it is
already against the law, though ignored
by the courts. As a loving father
I want to, and will, see a PRESUMPTION
of shared parenting become law and be
enforced. The only question is
when. Anything else creates huge
incentives for legal battles, which
hurt children and families and drain
their finances for the benefit of lawyers
and judges. The current system
has become a distorted mess over the
last thirty years. Effectively the judicial
branch of government is still living
in the 1950s.
Imagine if you had to run for election
with the presumption you would lose,
and therefore (because of that presumption)
your opponent got all the money from
your fundraising efforts! Would
that not be outrageous? This is
exactly what is happening in family
courts today , and the lawyers love
this because it generates excessive
legal fees, more conflict and drains
the estates of families at their most
vulnerable time. Mothers are set
up to get the majority of the estate
and legal and physical custody of the
children one day one of a divorce filing. Fathers
must battle back, spending a fortune
to get any chance of fair treatment.
Ultimately they loose anyway, no matter
what the situation and are raked over
the coals with tens of thousands in
unnecessary legal fees. It is
insidious and generates miserable results.
Shared parenting is coming, the grass
roots movement is forming now worldwide.
You can fight it and lose votes, or
join it, because it is in the best interests
of children and families and the RIGHT
thing to do.
You must decide. However, clearly you
are not yet aware of the inevitability
of this due to our FUNDAMENTAL constitutional
rights to raise our children, and
enjoy their company.
Additionally the laws the legislatures
have implemented to protect battered
women are being used to abuse fathers.
Today between 50% and 90% of restraining
orders are used to throw the
father out of the house and denying
them access to their children, often with
false (and sometimes even no) charges.
This is enormously destructive to families
and children. However, again the legal
system loves t because it generate huge
legal fees, due to the undebatable abuse
of father's constitutional rights.
No "due process", no presumption
of innocence, no "equal rights"
guaranteed under the ERA. The
research is now in, yet the family courts
are basing their decisions today on
research that is decades old (and was
never scientifically valid), and based
on traditions that should have gone
away with the Equal Rights Amendment.
Do you know that Virginia, with a population
similar to Massachusetts, has about
1,500 outstanding restraining orders
at any one time and Massachusetts has
over 50,000? Do you think men in Massachusetts
are 33 times more violent? Of course
not, lawyers in Massachusetts, Connecticut
and may states are using this legislation
for unfair advantage in divorce. The
abuse is immoral, rampant and despicable.
Any woman that is willing to say the
word "fear" to a judge, true
or not, immediately evicts her husband
and controls the children and home one
day one. It is a horrible situation.
There is no question that the family
courts and judges are literally breaking
the constitution every day (Title 42,
Sec. 1983, 1985 and other amendments).
The only question is when will they
be called to task and held responsible
for this behavior. I, for one, am committed
to a multi-year battle to make this
happen and will be raising millions
of dollars for this cause (as I have
one for other worthy nonprofit and children's
causes in the past).
Fatherlessness is now encouraged by
the states and current legal system.
It is one of the largest problems in
the U.S. today. It is a silent travesty
that is now coming to light. Please
research this further and you will easily
see that only lawyers and judges benefit
from the current system, not children
and families. Of course they want it
maintained for their personal enrichment.
The government is now effectively regulating
against marriage, because it is so onerous
to get divorced today, with as much
as 40% of your after tax income going
to your ex-wife just for "child
support". On average this can represent
more than six times the actually cost
of raising a child (by independent statistics).
Hence this is "child extortion"
not child support - which would be 50%
of the actual cost of raising a child
- 1/10th today's level. Any man
earning less than $70,000 per year can
not even afford their own small apartment
in Massachusetts and many other states
today. The men pay the taxes on the
ex-wife free ride income and far more,
as the women get the "head of household"
tax benefits. This is just the
tip of the proverbial iceberg.
You must become more informed on this
issue. I trust further research will
educate you on the damage current laws
are causing to our children and families.
Robert - A concerned father whose children
have been kidnapped by the state