The book "Father and Child
Reunion" does a terrific job
of articulating how this has happened
over the last 30 years and what we
need to do to fix it. The author
was on the board of the National Organization
of Women (NOW) for more than one elected
term and fought for female equality
for many years. Only when the pendulum
swung too far did he begin focusing
on the issues that men need fixed.
Today women can choose to kill a
fetus without the male having any
right to participate in that decision,
yet the male is enslaved for 18 to
23 years by that decision with child
support - even if the woman tricked
him purposely (by committing fraud)
by saving his sperm and impregnating
herself intentionally. The women's
movement claims "my body, my
choice" because of the 9 months
of inconvenience to gestate a fetus,
yet totally ignores the 18 years of
effective slavery thrust on men by
the decision to have that child!
Outrageous, illogical and driven by
a powerful feminist movement with
no counter balancing men's rights
The woman can leave a new born baby
at a fire station "no questions
asked", yet again the male must
pay 18 to 23 years of child support,
representing basically all of his
disposable income and, in Massachusetts
40%, of his after tax income. This
is effectively slavery.
A women has the right to ongoing
financial support after marriage only
because more than 85% of the time
she gets physical custody of the children
- yet with no accountability for how
that money is spent. Is it all going
to the children? Of course not - it
is many times what the children need.
Yet a man has no continuing rights
of support on anything that the may
have woman contributed to the marriage
- Why is financial support a commitment
for after the marriage when nothing
else is? Could it be because
the divorce industry and government
profit from this ongoing money stream
-- of course it is.
Since a contract requires a quid
pro quo to be enforceable, many experts
are saying there is no longer an effective
contract in marriage under these laws.
Women have all the rights and men
have all the responsibilities.
The law is decades behind the times
and so sexually biased that virtually
every divorce proceeding is completely
unconstitutional today. These kangaroo
courts deny men equality, due process
and force men under duress of jail
and losing access to their children
into effective slavery.
Men currently pay child support of
about 4 to 10 times the actual cost
of raising a child. They should
pay only 50% (maybe with some adjustment
for daycare in the preschool years).
This would be true "equal rights
for women". Independent
sources like Money, Kiplinger's and
the U.S. government estimate the total
cost of raising a child today at just
over $100,000. Yet a man with an income
of $75,000 will barely be able to
afford his own apartment after a divorce
under these laws and will pay a total
of $351,000 in child support over
18 years! He should be paying $50,000
(half)!!! That is SEVEN TIMES the
actual COST OF RAISING THE CHILD.
No one can even argue this is just
the new alimony, and therefore a holdover
to decades past and completely inappropriate
in today's world where most women
work - and all should after the kids
are in school. The myth is that women
get poorer after divorce, that FACT
is that men do. Women do very well
even after just the second year with
this level of financial extortion
done by hold the father's children
hostage by the state.
As men generally we all have an innate
desire to protect woman. Women generally
have an innate desire to nurture.
Yet when the children arrive you can
bet that that nurturing support of
the husband quickly turns to the children,
and the husband now is the target
of nagging and no end of responsibility
instead. Woman got what they
wanted - the kids - and now the father
is disposable. Well the facts
are in children do MUCH, MUCH better
with exposure to both parents.
Funny 10 million years of evolution
got this better than the social engineering
of judges and legislators.
Most women will turn on their husbands
in a divorce and provide nothing in
return for up to an 18+ year "salary"
the state forces men to pay women.
Attorneys encourage this because it
is the best way to maximize attorney's
fees and the percentage of the divorce
estate that will be divided up among
the divorce industry players, who
add little value but collect $250
BILLION per year from broke families
who are often in financially desperate
straights during the transition.
This industry clearly does far more
to hurt children and families than
it does to help them due. Ethics
do not exists in this industry really
- they all live off the pain of the
orders, designed to protect battered
women, are used to abuse men by throwing
them out of their house, gaining control
of the children and setting one party
up as the default winner, so the other
must spend a fortune on lawyers to
get anything out of the divorce. Again
constitutionally illegal by any measure,
but happening every day. I have been
told between 50% and 90% of restraining
orders are completely bogus with no
physical violence or physical threat
of any kind EVER happening. I have
been told Virginia has 1,500 restraining
order outstanding at any one time,
while Massachusetts, with a similar
size population has over 50,000! DO
you think this means men in Massachusetts
are 33 time more violent than in Virginia?
Or might it be that Massachusetts
attorneys and judges have a different
standard and perspective on restraining
orders which generates higher legal
fees and lower "exposure"
for the judges who are afraid of showing
up on the six o'clock news with a
single incident of a woman beaten
due to fear from powerful woman groups
- funded by government and out of
control - and therefore takes away
the rights of 99% of the men for the
1% problem! Un-American - Unconstitutional
and immoral I think.
What would you feel if the "company"
you worked for (your wife) fired you
and you had to pay them 18 years worth
of severance pay. This is exactly
what happens to men today - the only
difference - you don't have to do
anything wrong to get fired (no fault
It is time for a change. Shared parenting
with equal parenting rights and responsibilities
won an 85% approval in the non-binding
referendum in Massachusetts in 2004.
This would require a presumption of
50% parenting time to each parent
(baring extreme circumstances of unfit
parents, which gets lots of publicity
but is the rare exception, not the
It is LONG PAST time for a change.
We must band together to FORCE judges,
legislators and others in this entrenched
industry to a new model of divorce
for the future of our children.
This industry has become terribly
corrupted, even though driven by some
good intentions. Federal kickbacks
to states encourage raising child
support collections bias every decision
made by judges, who get increased
budgets and staff for every dollar
they route through this state collection
system. The family courts are an out
of control monster feeding on the
pain and suffering of children, wives
and husbands at their weakest point.
There is no accountability to anyone,
as they have past laws making them
not liable for anything.
It is time for serious change!!!